Tuesday, March 31, 2009

GHOST IN THE GRAVEYARD

For 11 year-old JEFFREY FITZPATRICK, living on a tucked away cul-de-sac in suburban Cincinnati in '76 meant lots of long, carefree summer days playing outside with his best friend DANNY and a slew of other neighborhood KIDS. The night before the neighborhood's big Bicentennial party, and with their PARENTS partying and otherwise paying little attention, the kids play their favorite "Tag"-like nighttime game "Ghost in the Graveyard"... only this time, when Danny is "it" he hides and is never found. Jeffrey's feeling of safety is destroyed when clues point to Danny's abduction and a search turns up nothing, but when Jeffrey is visited by what appears to be Danny's GHOST he comes out of his shell determined to solve the mystery himself.

"Come out, come out, wherever you are!"

Monday, March 30, 2009

A NASTY PIECE OF WORK

NAP BLAYLOCK is a lot like life- he's nasty, brutish and short. What the British expat lacks in height he more than makes up in physical strength, bad attitude and a gift for insults, all big reasons why he's an in-demand bodyguard for ACTORS and SINGERS... of course it doesn't hurt that Nap makes them look tall in comparison. When Nap falls in love with SUNDARI, the peaceful instructor of a Los Angeles meditation group, his defining traits are defused and his lack of sharpness begins to enable the STALKER plaguing his oft-nominated-but-never-a-winner client FRANKIE LEUNG as awards season kicks into gear. Can Nap reconnect with his inner asshole and save the day without losing his new love?

"Nap Blaylock is short, sharp, and shocking!"

Sunday, March 29, 2009

MY ADVERSARY

WILL PINKERTON is tired of feeling like the second banana in his own life, and decides it's time to part ways with his looooong time best friend ALEX. Alex's smug alpha male arrogance was a lot funnier when they were 19 than it is at 29... Unfortunately for Will, everyone else in his life thinks it's a huge mistake and does their best to get them back "together." Will's plan for independence and maturity backfires when Alex toys with Will's budding relationship with RENEEÉ (who, naturally, was introduced to Will by Alex), throws fuel on the fire of Will's precarious work situation and even turns Will's expansive FAMILY against him. All Alex wants is for Will to say "uncle" and return to the uneven arrangement they'd always had, but when Will discovers that Alex has been casually sabotaging his life for kicks since high school he decides to fight fire with fire.

"Have you ever had a best friend that you just plain hate?"

Saturday, March 28, 2009

DEATH'S DOOR

Chemist DAN ZELLER, once a rising star at a major pharmaceutical company and now a junkie on a death trip, sees his entire life flash before his eyes... sees dead friends and relatives waiting to greet him... and fully believes he's dead. He wakes up and discovers that the unique combination of chemicals he ingested can produce the repeatable "life flashing before eyes" reaction, with each trip producing a more vivid experience of standing between life and death. Paradoxically, this discovery snaps him out of his suicidal spiral and he seeks reconciliation with his ex-wife COLETTE, but as he and his volunteer guinea pig AARON continue to experiment in secret hoping to unlock the secrets of the soul, death and afterlife, they begin to believe that souls of people they once loved have changed into something unrecognizable and are coming back to this world with them... craving a new host.

"Knock knock... what's there?"

Friday, March 27, 2009

MUMBO JUMBO

A close-knit clique of HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS in Salem, Massachusetts think it's cheeky to play with Ouija boards and dabble in Wicca to toy with the GROWN-UPS in the town still famous for its Witch Trials over 300 years later. The tables appear to be turned when they befriend OLLIE, an impish exchange student from Zanzibar who claims that the true history of witchcraft in Salem began when slaves from his village arrived and shared their magical talismans with the locals. At first, the teens dismiss Ollie's "mumbo jumbo" but one by one they begin to believe when their contact with Ollie's talisman gives them the ability to see spirits and cast spells, and opens a very frightening door to Salem's sordid past.

"They see something unbelievable... can you?"

Thursday, March 26, 2009

THE NOT-TOO-DISTANT FUTURE

It's time to have fun with the ever-increasing pace of technological change in our lives. The time is... one entire year from today. The way we are born, communicate, love, listen to music and die is utterly unrecognizable from 2009. In fact, the way we do all these things at the beginning of the movie is unrecognizable from how we do it at the end. JOHNY5 is 15 going on 50 going on 5... and thinking about retirement. His despondency about the present/future and aching nostalgia for the way things used to be... in 2006... drives him to the edge of self-annihilation, where he meets ELIZABETH, a generation older than him at 20 but young enough to help him see that there is still hope for them both if they can just hold on until... next week.

"The future is so five minutes ago."

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

FINDER'S FEE

It's a mad mad mad mad dash for cash when an infamous HEIRESS comes out of the decade-long seclusion that followed the death of her BILLIONAIRE PHILANTHROPIST husband and offers 10% of her fortune if one of the three best MATCHMAKERS in the world can introduce her to a new husband even better than her notoriously perfect first. Her peculiar caveats- the man must a) never have heard of her or her husband, b) be able to make her laugh, and c) be able to answer a riddle she's created- give the matchmakers (the CON-ARTIST, the ROMANTIC and the GOLD-DIGGER) lots to do as they scramble to find... or create MR. RIGHT in one week's time.

"The best matchmakers in the world have met their match."

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

TOUR DE FORCE

Growing up the son of a SERVANT in the court of CHARLES I in England, young EDWARD RYAN's abilities as a musical prodigy were seen merely as an amusement for the courtiers. Exposed to the otherworldly music of China's Shaolin Temple during a visit to the court by the monk-like DESCENDENTS of MARCO POLO, Edward sells himself into the caravan heading back East in hopes of studying with the musical MASTER of Shaolin. After proving his worth over the course of years, Edward is allowed to study the mystical blend of music and the martial arts at the foot of the Master, and must choose between a life of music and a life of war when his former childhood tormentor, now KING CHARLES II, demands that the now-legendary Edward return home to fight for England.

"One hand created while the other destroyed."

Monday, March 23, 2009

IN THE GRAND SCHEME

When their tenure is revoked in the shadiest of fashions by the WEALTHY BROUGHTON FAMILY who controls the private Southern university's sizable endowment, three shaggy HISTORY PROFESSORS (FRANCIS, ALEXANDRA and SMITTY) enlist the help of two students- overachiever JANE on academic scholarship and ARTHUR a gifted but easily distracted trustafarian- to construct a revenge scheme based on some of history's most intrepid counterattacks and designed to restore glory to their embattled department. What begins as a local turf battle quickly goes global when they discover the Broughton's have been funneling dirty money from the black market sale of some of history's most sought-after artifacts through the university.

"Those who remember history are armed to fight with it."

Sunday, March 22, 2009

FANTASY SEQUENCE

It's time to play with narrative structure. We're all familiar with fantasy and dream sequences in film misdirecting us for a moment and revealing something critical about the characters experiencing them... what would it be like if virtually an entire film was made up of fantasy sequences, and the audience was left to decide what (and where) the few reality sequences were... and what they meant? FRANKLIN BERGEN is a young boy... or an old man... or a husband... or a prisoner... or a shaman, and he may be experiencing a surrealist pastiche of his past, a revelation about his future, or a night of bad dreams brought on by Thai food. One thing's for certain, he is growing very weary of being chased by... SOMEONE.

"I am a nightmare walking."

Saturday, March 21, 2009

THE SITTING BOOK

While sorting through the long squirreled-away personal effects of his dead banker FATHER, frustrated artist BRENT ESTABROOKS discovers his "Sitting Book," a journal that listed all of the models that sat for him as a painter in NYC in the late 40s and early 50s. Brent had no idea that his father ever held a brush, let alone rubbed shoulders with POLLOCK and painted portraits of BILLIE HOLIDAY, but when he uses the inspiration from this discovery to dive into his own long-suffering artistic pursuits at the expense of time with his wife DARLA and two young CHILDREN, the unsettling changes he undergoes shed light on why his father compartmentalized his life so completely.

"When he suffered for his art, he didn't do it alone."

Friday, March 20, 2009

CORDIALLY HATED

Insulated WILLIAM F. ISLINGTON IV, Harvard Class of '29, has just discovered something amazing: everyone in his life who'd always smilingly treated him with the utmost respect actually loathes him and his entire family. At school he was secretly hated for the wealth accumulated by his corrupt railroad baron FATHER AND GRANDFATHER, in Europe he was secretly hated because his family plundered their treasured works of art and, hardest of all for our naïve William to fathom, the entire staff of the family manse- always so kind to his face- hated him with a white-hot passion... including fiery-eyed RUBY SCUFF, daughter of his father's obedient VALET. When the stock market crash of '29 leaves him penniless, William rejoices in the fact that he now knows the truth and sets about trying to restore honor to his family by working for Ruby and her father.

"Sometimes you need a broken mirror to see who you really are."

Thursday, March 19, 2009

MORE WISHES

Mischievous high school senior AL MCKEE has a highly developed ability to talk himself out of... or into any situation, and puts it to the test as part of an elaborate prank by convincing the NIGHT WATCHMAN at the museum that he and his lackey friend GOOBS are there to replace him. In the back room Al uncovers an ancient Arabic lamp that, when rubbed, emits a cocky GENIE who offers Al three wishes. Al cleverly becomes the first human ever to trick the Genie into giving him "more wishes" with his third wish, but quickly finds that each wish he makes- even as it comes true in spectacular fashion- takes him further away from his ultimate goal of having straight-laced beauty CLAIRE KILROY fall in love with him.

"What would you wish for?"

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

LOTERÍA

For a grumpy group of RETIREES the predictable tedium of life at a Los Angeles retirement home is given a jolt of life - and mystery - when the new nurse, vivacious Latina ROMA, introduces them to Lotería, the Mexican game of chance. Not only do her riddle-style announcements of each card ("El Diabolito," "La Estrella," etc) closely match long-hidden secrets from their lives, but the winner of each day's game is visited by SOMEONE- or something- from their past that gives them each a final shot at redemption.

"As long as you're in the game you have a chance to win."

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

THE NARCOLEPTIC

DREW GREEN is a professional narcoleptic. Because of his unusually powerful condition, he's been the subject of numerous sleep studies since childhood, appeared on talk shows and at medical conferences and even had a book written about him by an infamous CELEBRITY PSYCHIATRIST. Sleepwalking through life, he'd never thought much about curing himself until he falls in love with ADELE, a beautiful young insomniac who desperately craves sleep and who triggers hypnagogic hallucinations in him that appear to be delivering clues about his own past and the mysterious origin of his narcolepsy.

"Love is a powerful wake-up call."

Monday, March 16, 2009

MR. SENSITIVE

It's time to satirize bromantic comedies... and torture porn, together. Delicately handsome and super-sensitive JOHNNY DARLINGTON was the kind of neighbor that the OLD LADIES in his building would have loved to set up with their NIECES and GRANDDAUGHTERS... if he wasn't always falling all over himself to be buddies with their nephews and grandsons. Once these DUDES get creeped out by his obsessive need to hang out, it's down to the basement they go... until fun-loving tomboyish jock KELLY FREDERICK moves in and throws a monkey wrench into Johnny's world: is she his new best friend, his first lover, his next victim... or all three?


"Don't hurt his feelings..."

Sunday, March 15, 2009

BOOTLEG JACKSON

KAREEM JACKSON feels he hasn't met anyone's expectations- at 5'5" his senior year of high school his ability to play his very tall PARENTS' favorite sport of basketball has yet to materialize- and he looks unlikely to ever get off the bench as the third string QB of the football team. That all changes when he discovers a magical typewriter in the basement of the OWNER of his favorite comic book shop and writes stories about his heroic exploits on the football field that begin to come true... but with unexpected consequences that quickly spiral out of his control.

"He's making it up as he goes along!"

Saturday, March 14, 2009

JELLYBEANS FOR DINNER

45 year-old PHILLIP ZABILLA always swore he'd never have any children, yet now he finds himself in a hospital waiting room expecting the birth of his first CHILD with a new GIRLFRIEND. As he waits he flashes back to the wild mood swings of his own childhood, raised by a collective of 60's RADICALS in a series of experimental utopian societies, always trying to shelter his younger sister REGINA from the lunacy around them, and ultimately losing her to the same excesses that claimed the minds of his loving but hopelessly misguided PARENTS.

"After the Summer of Love came the Fall."

Friday, March 13, 2009

BURY THE HATCHET

Years after nastily burning bridges with FRIENDS and FAMILY in the small Colorado town he left behind for success as a film & TV star in Hollywood, a newly chastened and financially devastated RICK JOSEPH invites a handful of the people he hurt the most to a weekend of reconciliation at his once-stately ski chalet in the Rockies. The wary guests are heartened to see a humble and gracious Rick welcome them, but the weekend takes a sharp downhill turn when gruesome "accidents" begin to occur and hidden cameras are discovered. Is this Rick's comeback special or a nightmare descent into booze, pills and vengeful murder?

"Good things come to those who hate."

Thursday, March 12, 2009

THE THRIFT STORE

(Artwork by Phony Artist)

The hodgepodge STAFF at a massive downtown Thrift Store keeps things lively by flirting, pranking THE BOSS and otherwise amusing themselves during store hours, but when a series of mysterious donations that appear to be from the 1920s start coming in and their regular CUSTOMERS experience dramatic strokes of good fortune or horrible luck while wearing the old stuff, they reluctantly begin to believe that their Thrift Store is haunted... and frantically try to solve the mystery when the Boss disappears.

"You'll get more than you bargained for!"

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

THE PINCH HITTER

When tough but untested JOEY BRAGANTI joined a crew of Brooklyn mobsters he had no idea it would be so... boring; he spent more time in front of a computer than he did shaking people down. That all changes when his crew's top HITTER comes down with the flu the day he's supposed to rub out a top lieutenant of the rival HANRAHAN FAMILY; Joey, called off the bench to make his first kill and finally become a made man, discovers not only that his target is childhood best friend PETEY HEALY but that Petey is engaged to marry "the one who got away" CHRISTINA MUSTARD. Joey kidnaps the two instead and flees, bringing the wrath of both families down upon him.


"When destiny calls, sometimes you should let it ring through."

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

THE LOVE TESTER

GREGOR, a rogue perfumer who's broken away from HIS MENTOR, the head of the world's largest fragrance corporation, enlists the unwitting help of mousy computer scientist EMILY to create a scent that, when applied, can prove if someone is in love or not. Gregor, a self-professed enemy of love, has notions of selling the scent for millions to spouses around the world curious if their mate is still in love, while Emily and the Mentor fight to stop him after she tests herself and discovers that she is in love for the very first time.

"Prove it!"

Monday, March 9, 2009

SCAVENGER HUNT

When a group of entitled New Orleans PREP SCHOOL SENIORS compete in a lewd and crude Scavenger Hunt against their rowdy PUBLIC HIGH SCHOOL counterparts in the Hurricane-ravaged ghost towns surrounding the city, they soon discover that a third team has entered the competition: displaced HUNTERS AND TRAPPERS who kill for sport.

"It's not a party until someone gets broken."

Sunday, March 8, 2009

SECOND UNIT

After the PRIMARY FILM CREW of an indie feature leaves their locations in the Utah desert to return to L.A., the second unit (SECOND UNIT DIRECTOR and CINEMATOGRAPHER, plus BODY DOUBLES for the two leads) remains to shoot additional footage and inserts. The director's GIRLFRIEND, an aspiring editor, notices ghostly images in his footage, and soon everyone in the second unit feels a SUPERNATURAL PRESENCE closing in on them and forcing them and their cameras to take part in an unholy ritual of death... and rebirth.

They say a camera can steal your soul... what happens to it next?

Saturday, March 7, 2009

THE TIEBREAKER

FRANKLIN FILLMORE and HECTOR CUETO have been the best of friends- and the fiercest of competitors- since childhood. Both former professional athletes, each man has accumulated the same amount of statistical records, championship rings, money, wives and children, and kept track of everything along the way... even down to who's won more at Scrabble head-to-head. When Hector is diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor, the two decide to embark on one last, epic competition to break the tie: a race around the world.

"Talkin' smack around the world and back."

Friday, March 6, 2009

DISCO STRINGS

In 1974, gifted but painfully shy violinist ARTHUR CLEMENTI's dream of playing for the Buffalo (NY) Philharmonic appears dead due to his crippling stage fright, but a chance encounter with THE BEE GEES leads to him becoming an in-demand arranger for the newest musical craze- Disco. Arthur takes some awkward stabs at living the high life, but appears to be the only Disco musician in the world not having any fun until he falls in love with actress/singer FANTASIA, half of the infamously hedonistic husband and wife duo THE DISCO SWINGERS, as Disco's popularity reaches its crescendo... then begins to tumble.

"He had the Talent, he had the Dream... but did he have the Disco Balls?"

Thursday, March 5, 2009

SINKING

JANE and "DOC" BUTLER's 25th Anniversary pleasure cruise with SIX LIFELONG FRIENDS goes horribly awry when their chartered yacht goes off course between Jamaica and Haiti and is boarded by ruthless COLUMBIAN PIRATES. The pirates loot the boat, kill THE CREW and JANE'S SISTER, destroy all communications equipment and leave the leaking, darkened boat listing in the middle of the ocean... where Jane Butler begins to piece together a theory that all of this was no accident and a KILLER may still be on board... as the ship takes on more and more water.

"There's not time to do much thinking, when the boat you're on is sinking..."

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

HIP-HOP POOL PARTY

The baddest MC in all of Corvalis, Oregon- 14-year-old JEREMIAH "THE RAINMAKAH" CARRUTHERS- convinces reclusive old-school DJ CRISPY to come down from the hills and drive him cross-country to crash the most exclusive hip-hop gathering of the year: LORD BIZZY'S "Hella Hamptons Pool Party." Lord Bizzy's notorious SEKURITY KREW won't be the only thing trying to prevent Jeremiah from making a starmaking performance- his PARENTS are in hot pursuit.

This summer, there's only one place to become a star."

and/or

"Old School.. New School.. it's ON at the Pool!"

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

THE GOOGLEBOTS

Newly-created search bot KIKI71 happily browses the web carrying out its indexing function until it stumbles upon the SPIDERS of a treacherous WEBMASTER who is quietly laying the groundwork to destroy the internet. KiKi71 enlists a motley crew of ANTS, DEEPBOTS, SPAM HARVESTERS and HUMAN USERS to fight back, all while trying to discover the identity of his creator... who may be the key to their salvation.

"Have you ever wondered what's really happening inside the internet?"

and/or

"Coming soon to a googolplex near you."

Monday, March 2, 2009

THE DONUT HOLES

12 year-old EDISON thought relocating from New Jersey to Berkeley so his CHEF MOM could open a new restaurant would be hard enough, but that was just the tip of the iceberg. Edison and his circle of new friends- all SONS and DAUGHTERS of Berkeley professors- band together to find Edison's missing mom and the local CRACKPOT ASTROPHYSICIST after a reaction between her one-of-a-kind food and his unstable wormhole experiment seems to open tiny doors to new dimensions.

"Saving the world never tasted so good."

Sunday, March 1, 2009

CANTALOUPE

Ten years after standing up bad boy JAMES on the night they were to elope together as teenagers, long since closed-off BECCA runs into him for the first time since then on the eve of her wedding to reformed bad boy PHILLIP and embarks on a roller-coaster night of soul-searching... with both men.

"What's the expiration date on the love that was forbidden fruit?"