SEVER LAND

Broken-armed 15-year-old MICHAEL WEIL is used to indignities, but when his PARENTS hire a hot 21-year-old babysitter named WENDY to fill in for the usual sitter PAMELA and stay with him and the 10-year-old twins (ELLA and NORMAN) while they go out of town for one night, he's mortified. Wendy coyly teases and toys with Michael, then shifts personalities, ties all three of them up and tells a bedtime story... a story of a terrible place called "Sever Land," an island where nice boys and girls are tortured and mutilated for the pleasure of THE CAPTAIN. The twins are scared out of their wits by the story, but when Michael bravely tries to show Wendy that he's not afraid of words, Wendy takes them all by the hand and FLIES OUT THE WINDOW... all the way to Sever Land. After Michael is separated from the twins by the hideously mutated LOST BOYS, he watches in horror as the Captain kills a bound and gagged Pamela and feeds her to his ALLIGATOR, knowing that this nightmare has become sickeningly real.

"You can die! You can die! You can die!"

(Special thanks to Jeremy and Billy at Tower Farm- gorging on their unique horror reviews gave me inspiration for today's pitch.)

OVERLOAD

One by one, SOMEONE... or SOMETHING is short-circuiting the minds of the PHYSICISTS and ENGINEERS running the Large Hadron Collider (LHC) 500ft feet below the surface of the Franco-Swiss border. With the connector to the surface sabotaged and communication cut off, science mag journalist TOBEY BRIDGES races against time to stem the flow of previously hypothetical particles of dark matter known as "strangelets" that appear and cause hyper-intense experiences of ecstasy or terror... and instantaneous, microscopic genetic mutations... when they interact with humans. When a countdown to collide opposing beams at dangerous strengths approaches zero hour, Tobey finds three dazed RELIGIOUS FANATICS who believed the LHC could bring about "the end of days" but now are gibbering that they've unleashed something far worse... something that's running loose in the tunnels and headed toward the surface.

"Experience terror on a molecular level."

100th Pitch and L.A. Examiner Interview

O.K... sunglasses on? Check. Now, you look that way and I'll look the other way...

I was fairly certain that I wouldn't make any extraneous posts during the course of the Movie Pitch Project, but in light of today being the 100th pitch AND the day that an interview with me conducted by Marvin Miranda was published at the L.A. Examiner, I thought I'd make an exception.

I just want to say thank you to all the people who've supported me during this process. The artwork that's been submitted is so fantastic, and I'm really moved every time I scroll down to one. I have a small but loyal group of followers whose clicks keep me inspired whenever my spirits are low or I'm contemplating letting the streak come to an end. Thank you to my copywriting clients at dsrielly.com- without you, undertaking passion projects like this would be impossible.

And finally, I have Mrs. Word Player, whose support of my stabs at creating something of value means more than words, or wordplay, can ever communicate.

OK, on with the show!

THE CENTURY CLUB

Connecticut teenagers DANIELLE, MICHAEL and OLLIE sneak down into Danielle's FATHER's basement laboratory to play the drinking game "Century Club": a 1 oz shot of beer every minute for 100 minutes. Danielle makes vicious fun of her father's longtime project- a time machine- but in fooling around with it she discovers what he's never been able to- it only works when the passengers have an extremely elevated blood alcohol level. The three of them wake up with a splitting headache... in the year 1910! Ollie, a first time drinker, just wants to get back home, but Danielle and Michael- who believe themselves to be party animals- get one new PERSON drunk in each century they joyride through until they're traveling backwards through time in what feels like an overstuffed VW Beetle. When a miscalculation takes them back 1000 years instead of 100 to the year 610 and there's not a drop of alcohol in sight, Danielle and her crew of CENTURY CLUBBERS sober up and search for a way back home.

"Time for a drinking game?"

THE ZINGER

KEITH AZINGER was a real wise-ass growing up. His uncanny knack for putting people down earned him the nickname "The Zinger" in high school, but his burgeoning popularity came to a screeching halt when a TEACHER he had mercilessly zinged in class went home that night and committed suicide. Ten years later Keith is a morose and taciturn suicide hotline operator who's kept his promise never to laugh or make a joke again, but when he falls in love with freewheeling zingmeister MAURA BACON he must choose between a life of guilty love and laughter, or pious penance and pain.

"A cutting wit can leave scars."

THE KINSMEN

CHAD JANKIEWICZ always knew he was different from the rest of his upper-middle class New Jersey FAMILY, but when he found out he was adopted it was the shock of a lifetime. ROBBIE MACGILLIVRAY shows up at Chad's high school graduation and tells him that he's the youngest of the five MACGILLIVRAY BROTHERS who were scattered to different points of the globe as young children to protect them after the murder of their ASTRONOMER PARENTS in Bonnybridge, Scotland by a NEFARIOUS SECRET SOCIETY. The surviving MacGillivrays are gathering back in Bonnybridge to avenge their parents' death and take part in a family ceremony that stretches back centuries and contains the secret of why there are more U.F.O. sightings in Bonnybridge than any place on Earth.

"Giving new meaning to the term 'distant relatives.'"

(Special thanks to Andrew Bosley's Brainstormer for help inspiring today's pitch!)

NONE THE WISER

Artwork by Somsara, courtesy of Art Design 3(6)5

PHILLIP CANNON is so smart it hurts. Literally. His work as a geneticist could very well lead to breakthroughs in fighting disease, but the millions of computations that constantly play out in his mind have all but paralyzed his ability to sleep, relax or converse with people whose IQ is below 170. When Phillip falls in love with sweet, uncomplicated MEG but finds himself unable to create any kind of rapport with her, he sets out to systematically dumb himself down... by any means necessary. His plan seems to be working, until smitten Meg discovers what he's doing and, along with Phillip's research partner (and jealous would-be lover) ALEXIS, they fight to turn him back towards unhappy brilliance.

"He was too smart for love."

THE PHYSICAL

DANNY WHEELER finally felt like his life was in order- new job, new town, and a great new girlfriend in COLETTE. When Colette finds out how long it's been since Danny has seen a doctor of any kind, she all but forces him to get a physical from her doctor just before Danny's 30th birthday. Cheerful DR. GALBRAITH is performing all the usual tests... then Danny wakes up in one of the patient's room. He's told he passed out when blood was being taken, but that doesn't feel right to him. Danny's health begins to deteriorate rapidly, but neither Colette nor Dr. Galbraith seem concerned at all. When his scalp begins secreting a film of viscous blue liquid every night, an increasingly frantic and weak Danny tries to find out what's been done to him and reverse it... despite everyone's assurances that he's going to be just fine.

"I promise, it's all in your head."

HUSH MONEY

Private detective HENRY HOLDER is hired by RACHEL BLAKE shortly after her father XAVIER's murder- not to solve it, but to find out who is still receiving large monthly sums of his (now her) money even after his death. Holder follows the money to three people (a COP, a WAITRESS and a MUSICIAN), but all of them can only tell him that they are being paid not to talk, and that if they say a word the payments will stop. As Holder develops feelings for both Rachel and ANNA the waitress, his investigation uncovers very dark secrets about the Blake family that could lead to some hush money of his own... if he's lucky.

"There are some very expensive skeletons in this closet."

THE VILLAIN

Artwork by Danielle Chitwood

FELIX was groomed from a very young age to be a villain. On his 18th birthday, feeling his training was complete, he betrayed and murdered his father and mentor CYRUS... and saw in Cyrus's dying eyes that he had done well... that he was ready. The burning question he faced was... ready for what? Felix leaves behind the wealth and power of his birthright and strikes out into the world seeking his destiny and evil identity... and believes he's found his path in the form of ALEXANDRA, a woman he could rule the world with... but is just as bent on turning him to the side of good as he is on turning her into a perfect villainess.

"The hero's journey didn't interest him."

GHOULS

High school senior CRAIG CHIMONIDES is devastated when his MOTHER is one of the 16 female employees massacred at her biological research facility by ROBERTO WRUT, the eccentric millionaire who provided their funding. When Craig returns from her funeral, he discovers a cryptic note from her telling him that he must go to her grave every night and wait for "a sign." Craig follows her instructions, and notices a scattering of other SONS and DAUGHTERS of the 16 victims... also waiting. Each morning when he returns home, he has vivid nightmares of cannibalism and mutations, and the daylight hours become more and more unbearable. Finally the night comes when the "child must give birth to the mother" and Craig and his fellow "ghouls" are compelled to dig up their mothers' corpses and for the final phase of an experiment that, Craig discovers, all 16 women willingly gave their lives to Roberto Wrut for... or, I should say, gave their first lives for.

"Life tastes sweetest after death."

SCREENS

It's no secret that the number of screens projecting images at us is increasing exponentially, and microtechnology researcher REED SCHUMAKER has been at the heart of many advances in the shrinking and ability of 21st century screens. When his local politician wife NATALIE is gravely injured in a car accident and knocked into a coma, Reed applies his untested, experimental contact lens-size screens to her eyes to project comforting images and home movies to her while she heals. Reed discovers an unexpected side effect of his treatment, when he picks up images from Natalie's mind's eye on the screen he is using to project to her eyes... images that show that her car crash was no accident and that she may have been the victim of a SERIAL KILLER using newly developed technology of his own to track and kill people who have already been injured, thus avoiding appearance of foul play. When Natalie dies, Reed embarks on a mission to avenge her death using "mind screens" to track down and destroy her murderer.

"Let me show you what I can see."

CASSINGLES

Two lifelong, 80s obsessed friends- bachelor ANDY SHOW (41) and bachelorette JENNIFER HOFFMAN (39)- become frustrated with the online dating options available to them and start their own service "Cassingles," which sets up people born in the 60s and 70s based on profiles generated strictly by who they were from ages 15-21 and tosses out information like net worth, career path and adult dating history. The service is an instant success, propelling Andy and Jennifer to media stardom and not a few eerily successful DATES of their own, but while previously shy Jennifer enjoys finally being "the pick of the litter," Andy interprets his blasé reaction to so many otherwise perfect dates as a sign that his true love has been staring him in the face all along.

"Love will never be an obsolete format."

THE BEACHWOOD PARROTS

A FAMILY of tropical parrots has been living wild in the Hollywood Hills of Los Angeles for generations, and have become quite Americanized- watching TV, eating junk food, and avoiding capture by ALOUICIOUS, the pet dealer to the stars. When the youngest parrot SETH comes across a book showing parrots just like him in their traditional habitats of Ecuador, he tries to organize the entire family to migrate back to South America and embrace their roots. Just as everything seems to be ready to go, his mother BUDGIE is captured by Alouicious and sold to an ANIMAL TRAINER who plans to use Budgie in a dangerous stunt on the Tonight Show for CONAN O'BRIEN and an audience of millions.

"Frankly, they're sick of crackers."

EVERY TRICK IN THE BOOK

MEYER RYAN, an 80-something retired history teacher and rabid baseball fan living a quiet life of fishing and pinochle in the Florida keys, is rooting hard for his grandson DAN. Dan is a rookie and September call-up for the San Francisco Giants, who are on the cusp of a historic playoff spot after chasing the heavily favored Dodgers all summer. When Dan shares some obscure managing tricks that Meyer taught him with Giants skipper BUG WANAMAKER, Bug hires Meyer as an assistant coach for a stretch run that requires the Giants, hobbled by injury and inexperience, to sweep the Dodgers in the last series of the year.

"Don't put life on a pitch count."

THE NEUTRALS

ERIC CLAYBER grew up "gung-ho and ready to go," but when he returned to Arizona after two tours of duty in Afghanistan he'd thoroughly changed his tune on the efficacy of violence to resolve conflict. Eric collects former SOLDIERS-OF-FORTUNE and MILITARY MEN and WOMEN of a similar mind from Iraq, Sudan, Korea and beyond to create "The Neutrals"- a covert team of combat experts who go out into the world to defuse conflict, disarm combatants and spread the gospel of nonviolent conflict resolution... all without ever firing a shot. This, of course, is much easier said than done, and soon their tactics manage to bring the angry LEADERSHIP of the American Military and global terrorist organizations together to stop their common enemy... which may have been the point all along.

"Teach a man not to kill, and you have saved your life and his."

WISED UP

16 year-old tinkerer and model-builder HARVEY TOWNE was more than happy at public school- they had great shop classes- but when his nouveau riche PARENTS force him to transfer to tony private school Country Day, he's thrust into the piranha-infested waters of competitive snobbery and casually cruel elitism. Much to his surprise, Harvey is given a new look by compulsive meddler SETAREH and is quickly recruited by JACK TALENT, the leader of the de facto mafia of RICH BOYS who run the school and enjoy wielding the power their status gives them. Harvey is enthralled at "having his eyes opened" to how the world works "out there" beyond his basement workshop, but is also conflicted about the changes he sees in himself when PEGGY YI and his FRIENDS from public school try to bring him back down to earth.

"Girls are mean, but boys are meaner."

MISS UNIVERSE

Gamine teen JANIE TOWNSHEND was surprised to be nominated for prom queen and even more surprised at how tough she took it when she lost... which wasn't helped by the teasing she took at the hands of eventual winner NINA FAIDE. Walking home with her shy date ZACK, Janie is blinded by a bright light from the skies and wakes up... on board an ALIEN spacecraft. Jamie and Zack are informed that Jamie has been selected as the most beautiful creature on Earth and is headed for the biggest beauty contest in the Universe as the entry for the pilots of the ship ARN and GHEEGHEE, two teenagers from the distant planet FYMITIS who are bitter about their own species's perceived ugliness. Janie and Zack learn a thing or two about the universe's standards of beauty... and competition... as they are forced to participate in the pageant against creatures from across the universe: winner takes all, the home planets of the runners-up are destroyed.

"Because if you don't look good, Earth don't look good."

TWIST AND SHOUT

It's time to have some fun with... movies that climax with pull-the-rug-out twist endings. 1965. VIOLA is a teenage girl determined to meet THE BEATLES, and when she doses herself and GEORGE HARRISON with LSD she discovers that the band are actually ALIENS. Suddenly, a much older Viola wakes up in the office of DR. MILLICKEN in a regression therapy session hoping to discover the identity of a KILLER who's been plaguing quiet Stinson Cove for decades, until we pull back to reveal that Viola is superstar MACK BRANCH in heavy prosthetic makeup playing the role he was born to play- his Beatles-obsessed mother Viola... who still whispers instructions to him from beyond the grave...

"Are you prepared for the unpreparable?"

DRAWING A BLANK

Celebrated visual artist JOSHUA RAYMOND was the toast of New York City, "The King of Stimuli" and one of the brightest stars of the art world. When his new love, sculptress ELIZA U., is diagnosed with terminal cancer, Joshua lashes out in his grief by embarking on his most ambitious project yet- to create a wide expanse of absolutely nothing where he and Eliza can share her last moments on Earth absolutely and utterly alone together. Joshua learns how to make the sky disappear, to create the illusion that there is no ground below them, but try as he might cannot stop time. Years after Eliza passes on, young artist FRANCES makes a pilgrimage to Joshua's empty landscape and proposes a new art experiment to him, one that could bring color back into the void.

"We live on a canvas... can we leave a mark?"